on what's in a name.

as brian and i get closer to our wedding, many people have been asking a natural question: will you take his name? and for me, the answer is no. i remember when i was growing up and realized this is the way things work and thinking to myself - that is not for me (little colleen was not amused by this business). as i got older, many people used my last name as a source of nicknames (big mack and mackdaddy are popular ones), as well as just calling me by my last name. and as i've spent more time in the working world, most colleagues know me by my current name. while it's not like after some time they couldn't figure it out, it's, you know, one less headache. but the real reason, at the end of the day, is that my last name is me. it's who i am. perhaps i'm more connected to my last name than some others, but my name also reflects my history, my culture, my heritage. and, at least in my case, brian's last name reflects nothing similar to mine. i look at his last name as something completely foreign to me. and i think brian would feel the same way - changing his last name to something completely different would feel just as odd. it would feel like if we got married and i was forced to dye my hair red. i'm not a red-head - why, now that i'm married, do i have to be?

however, on the other hand, i get it. you are becoming a family the day you say i do, and a family unit shares a last name. and from that perspective i get it. yet, of course, no man would change his last name in order to fulfill this. so yes, i get it, but i suppose the tradition of one gender conforming does rub me the wrong way. and in this way, i'm in the minority. in america, approximately 90% of women change their name when they get married. that's a lot. and out of my friends, every single one of them has changed their name except for my college roommate (must have been something in that water in our apartment!) so for all appearances, most women still seem to love and embrace this tradition.

for my part, i've made it clear this isn't something i'll draw a hard-line on. if someone calls me by brian's last name i won't correct them. if we have children they will have his name (no hyphens here, folks). and i've also made it clear that i'm fully aware that this may not last. it could be too much of a legal and paperwork headache as the years go on to have separate last names within the same household. if we do have children, i may consider it more important for us all to have the same last name. all i know is that right now, and for most of my life, it's just not something i've wanted. basically, i want to get married but i don't want to become a red-head in the process. is that so much to ask?

on my weekend in pictures.

oh new york, new york. it can be a strange place this town. and sometimes that leads to good times, and sometimes that leads to bad times. saturday, for me, was new york at it's finest and at it's worst. when i was walking home in the afternoon i happened to pass the anchorman 2 set. and so i walk along, minding my own business, when will ferrel runs past me, filming a scene. or perhaps i should say ron burgundy ran past me as he was all dressed up for the part. the most wonderful thing about movies (or sets) like that one is that they totally transform the street. on fifth avenue it was 2013 and on broadway it was 1973. all the taxis and costumes and handlebar mustaches - it's always a trip. a strange, but fun, trip.

then, later that night, at a club for a friend's bachelorette party, i bumped into one of the managers. he proceeded, in a coke-fueled rage, to scream in my face about shoving him and then, AND THEN, got a bouncer to throw me out of the club! i was dying - dying - of laughter over this. little old me, sipping on a small glass of champagne, sober as a skunk, thrown out of a club. i mean, truth be told, i really felt like such a badass - thrown out of a big time club in nyc, that's living y'all! however, my bad-assness was quite short-lived - after waiting outside for a few minutes the bouncer snuck me back in, thoroughly convinced that i was probably the least of that club's problems (and from what i saw in there, i most definitely was). it was all very scandalous, and i loved it, except for the part where i was screamed at. have you ever had a strange man scream in your face? it doesn't make for the best night. and that's new york - it's filled with some very strange, very angry people, who do love a good power trip. and that just makes it a drag some times.

but, let's end this post on a good note. it gets better than those two stories.

often when i'm out and about on the town, particularly for a party, i like to seize opportunities that come my way. if someone asks me to do something the answer is almost always yes. i mean - if they're asking me to stroll down a dark alley with them it's probably not going to happen - but i try to be game for what comes my way. so, on the way to the club, whilst hailing down a taxi, a limo stopped. usually in new york town cars or private sedans will also try to stop and pick you up but they cost a ridiculous amount of money so you shoo them on their way. but a limo? sure - i was game. the driver said ten bucks a lady and i said you've got a deal. and that's how we took a random limo to the club, where we blasted eminem's "real slim shady" (as it's what came on the radio), like the ballers we are (or in my case, like the badass i am). because what cool, hip, young woman doesn't listen to eminem's "real slim shady" on her way out for the night?

oh, new york. stay strange. stay wonderful. 

on my fangirl moment.

dressed up as angela with a stapler in jello/with a gift from my roommate with a favorite quote from the office on it

well, the day has finally come. the day i dreaded since the summer of 2005 when i first fell in love with the office. i watched the first season that summer, only 5 or 6 episodes, and from the moment season two debuted it was true love. and for the next two years, every thursday, without fail, my group of friends from college and i would get together and watch it. we laughed our butts off, fell in love with jim and pam and wished michael would find love and maybe tone down the awkwardness. creed, though, we thought was perfect. every thursday we did this...and then headed out to the bars together. it's probably one of my most cherished and appreciated memories i made with those friends. when i got a text from my college roommate last night, where we both admitted to the fact that the last few episodes have been a mixture of lots of laughter and lots of tears, it brought me back to those thursday nights. the office holds a special, sentimental little place in my heart because of that but, don't get me wrong - i'd still think it was one of the best shows that's ever been on television. almost everyone has a show, or a movie, or a play, that is implicitly theirs. and when someone says they don't like the office, or they don't get the humor, i simply nod and smile and promptly remove myself from the situation. there is no reasoning with a super fan like me - and no one can say anything denigrating about the office to me. it just won't fly.

and why - why do i love this show so much? as the years have gone by, some people, who say they're "fans", have ceased watching the show. it's not any good since steve carrell left. or it's not funny anymore. or it's hit and miss, they say. and, to me, those people never really got what the office was about in the first place. sure, episodes stumbled here and there. yes, the writers have made andy's character change personalities a few too many times. but at the end of the day, the office was a love story. many people's love stories - dwight and angela, michael's search for love, andy's search for love, and, of course, above all of these - jim and pam. and it was here where the office excelled. many episodes i have laughed until my sides hurt, or repeated certain lines for months on end, sure - but these episodes had just as many moments where my heart skipped a beat, or i held my breath in anticipation, or i shed a few tears as two people finally found love. all of which, of course, was made possible by an amazing cast - i'm always dumbfounded that the actors who play jim and pam aren't actually together in real life. so many moments from the show about these two still give me the same reaction - i tear up when jim finally kisses her, i can't stand pam when she's too afraid to say something to jim when he's dating karen, the reaction they have on camera, with no sound and no lines, that lets you know they just found out Pam is pregnant never ceases to amaze me, i still cry at their wedding when jim says his plan was to marry her a long time ago after they do an impromptu ceremony on a boat, and when i watch last week's episode again i will still shake my head in amazement when i see jim finally give pam that teapot note.

(and yes, i am currently crying after typing that all out).

yeah, sure - the office is a comedy. but it's really just one big, grand love story - the kind of love story we all can relate to. we have all been at a job, or in a class, and pined away for someone. along with the weird co-workers, the office was just so damn relatable at the end of the day. comedy, love story, drama - it was, at the end of the day, a story about life. and what could be more compelling than that?

***

"I bought those boat tickets the day I saw that YouTube video. I knew we'd need a backup plan. The boat was actually Plan C, the church was Plan B, and Plan A was marrying her a long, long time ago. Pretty much the day I met her." -- jim

on a compromising dinner.

as summer is coming and all the pasta and donuts that kept me warm throughout the winter are making their presence known, i've started to make a bigger push to eat more lean protein for dinner. usually during the week pasta is my fallback meal, which is fine, but not fine to do every night. the only catch is - brian doesn't really like fish (hate would be an appropriate word). and while he, or myself, are free to eat different meals, in tiny new york kitchens it's better to have one cook in the kitchen rather than two. while this salmon dish is still, hands down, one of the best recipes i've put on the blog and one i try to use at least once a week, salmon is not a great fish to eat if you don't like fish. it's called a "fishy" fish, which i don't really get as a fish lover, but whatever. fine. this time around i tried to use a more subtle fish - sea bass - but wanted to keep the premise similar to the salmon recipe: all ingredients must basically be on hand, already in my kitchen, and the only thing i'd have to pick up on the way home would be the fish. and voile - mustard crusted sea bass.

the recipe also calls for olive oil, balsamic vinegar, salt and pepper - but i deemed them not worthy of the photograph. the original recipe calls for marjoram and, while i have nothing against marjoram, there comes a point where you're tired of picking up a whole new bottle of seasoning for one recipe. in these instances i usually google the spice to learn what family it's in/what it tastes like. it doesn't always work - for instance, rosemary is part of the mint family, and replacing rosemary with mint or vice versa would result in a completely different meal. however, in this case, marjoram is in the same family as oregano, it just usually tastes a little sweeter. i have lots of oregano, one of my favorite seasonings, so i just subsititued oregano for marjoram. feel free to use the marjoram if you would like. and, to make it simpler, i used dried thyme and oregano, not fresh herbs. remember, when you substitute dried herbs for fresh herbs, cut the amount in half - dried herbs have a much stronger flavor than fresh herbs.

so mix up your few ingredients, rub your filets with a little oil, then rub with the marinade, then lay thin slices of lemon on top. pop into a 400 degree oven for twenty minutes, depending on your oven. next time i'll cook mine a little less as my oven runs hot.

and scene - 20 minutes later you're done, and it took only a couple of minutes to put together the marinade. serve with some fresh vegetables and you've got a perfect summer meal! and, yes, brian actually enjoyed it. now to convince him to eat more salmon...

on my weekend in pictures.

this weekend was probably the friendliest weekend i've ever had in new york city. wearing my college sweatshirt on the way to and from workouts, i had two separate people spark conversations with me (one who went to school nearby and a fellow alum), and as i was leaving my building yesterday a neighbor started talking to me, with the conversation lasting a few blocks. i mean, it was crazy people! so much friendliness, which i'm assuming is a product of the weather, does not always come easy in new york. although now i do feel like i used up all of my friendly encounters for the year. it's probably just scowls and curse words muttered under one's breath from here on out. oh well. besides all of the good vibrations this weekend, i also ran a 10K (and beat my time by three minutes from last year!), brian and i hosted a party at his apartment, and we enjoyed the weather with a long walk around brooklyn. not too shabby if you ask me. (oh, and i ate all this delicious stuff below, with a recipe coming for you tomorrow!)