Wednesday, September 5, 2012

on the art of the possible.

via here.
i went to pick up brian's keys last night for his new apartment - it seems a fitting thing to do the day after labor day. for many, the fall season has conditioned us for change. after years and years of new school starts it seems to come naturally. change, moving forward, getting older. new teachers, new classrooms, new schools, maybe new friends. it doesn't seem so out of place to change jobs, cities, or apartments with the arrival of fall. as you get older, change doesn't necessarily become easier, but i think you realize how precious it can be as it arrives fewer and far between than on it's yearly schedule. 
i went in by myself to measure his new space. to turn on faucets and lights and flush toilets and close doors and make sure everything was in working order. i measured his bedroom and his living and the space where we want to put a new table. the first little dream of enjoying dinner together and having friends over impressing itself on the empty, untouched space. no scratches on the wooden floor. no dings on the wall. no memories of arguments or tears or days less than good.
right now there is only the possibility of what it all will be. the pretty new appliances and new furniture arrangements and delicious dinners and long nights filled with laughter and love. for a moment the adult inside of us quiets and we seem to be filled with only optimism. the possibilities that live in our heads that come along with change are never bad, they're always good. any questions we may have or that linger seem so much harder to grasp than the happiness we easily envision. perhaps it's our way of coping with change, or a deep, underlying want we all have to really think that - maybe this time - it will be perfect. as we get older we often become cynical, jaded, disheartened. so i stood in his apartment, after the measuring and opening and shutting of doors, just reveling in all of that change for a moment. in all of that hope. those little dreams. in the possible.
we shall see. indeed, we shall see.

12 comments:

  1. I grew up with a lot of changing scenery, and now it's something that I crave. Sometimes I wish I could feel settled in a place or career, but for better or worse, change is always a process of cleansing for me. And I think that is so SO important.

    You've captured all this beautifully here. Congrats on all the new possibilities!

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  2. You've really put such a positive spin on moving that I feel ashamed - but of course you're totally right. There's such potential when you see a space you're about to move into

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  3. I just love, love, love this outlook on moving to a new place. You are so right! We envision only good things, and for a few moments there is such bliss. I'm excited for you and Brian in this new adventure together!

    P.S. why is New York so COOL? seriously, that is an amazing bay window that you'd never get in a rental apartment down here.

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    1. thank you! i am so excited too! and yes, i agree, old cities seems to have such cool touches in their fixed up apartments.

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  4. I'm so excited for this next season for you and Brian! And all the newness and the endless possibilites that lie ahead as you anticipate his moving into his new apartment. The apartment, by the way, looks amazing!

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    1. thank you lady! we definitely are, too.

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  5. So much potential and possibilities in a new space. I always love finding a new one too. Best of luck!

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  6. They say that moving is one of the most stressful things you will do in life... but I disagree, each time we have moved, it's been stressful but it's also been sooooo exciting! I love your outlook Colleen and I am so excited for you! Whoop whoop to Christmas in the new house :)

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    1. thank you - can't wait for that last part ;)

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  7. This post is just so good. And so true.

    Is Brian moving soon?

    (love that apartment pic. reminds me of my first ever in Boston on Beacon Street. memories!)

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